MY VERY FIRST BLOG POST – 31 DEC 2016

So, I started this blog in order to kind of create an online diary where I can share my thoughts, ideas, hobbies and other interests and perhaps see if anyone out there relates to or can share their thoughts or comments with me in return. I guess what I hope to achieve from this is gaining insight from other people, learning more about myself and perhaps a place to express myself where I cannot usually do so in every day life, aka reality. So… this is me!

I have a ridiculous and unnatural connection with cats. All cats – big cats, small cats, kittens, strays, domesticated cats… not lions or anything like that. I absolutely adore their lives… snoozing all day and laying in the winter sun, snacking and chomping away while their owners duck and dive to serve their every need. They were born to be gods and so they are 🙂 Feel free to share all your cat photos with me and tell me their names and about their personality, I would find it incredibly fascinating.

I also love to travel – the excitement of going somewhere new and exploring the world is just a dream for me. I respect all people and their cultures and languages and especially the food. Oh, how I love food. Looking back, I think the two best cities ive been to is (actually the island) of Koh Samui in Thailand and a tie between London and Washington D.C. All for every different reasons which I am happy to share with anyone who asks.

Thank you and I hope you guys all have a good read and perhaps I may write something that captivates a few of you – then my goal would have been accomplished.

Inside Sabina’s mind

I live in a world where war is sold to the highest bidder. Corrupt politicians watch their people starve, refuse to address serious worldly issues or cooperate with other governments to make this world a better place. I live in a world where there is unprecedented greed like people don’t know that death is inevitable. We have all experienced it in one way or another by losing a friend , parent, family member, pet or someone. We know what death is but until it’s you that’s dying , we don’t comprehend that we will in fact, die. Nothing material we acquire in this life will go with us to the grave. So why is it so important where money, fame, fortune and status is just all that matters.

I live in a world where we, human beings, have learnt by being taught through upbringing, schooling and further tertiary education, that we are the superior race. It is not even discussed where on the food chain we are. We have not been taught that we share this Earth with other sentient beings.

I live in a world where we torture, claim ownership and slaughter other beings for the purposes of food, clothing, comfort, aesthetic makeup’s.

I live in a world where rape is a common thing. Men do not respect women’s bodies and what it represents. And vice Versa but more of the former. What are natural physiological and biological urges have now been used to justify the exploitation, trade and use of other human beings.

I live in a world where we don’t talk about these things enough. Or maybe we talk about them too much. Just talk and more talk. Charity days, cancer awareness month, etc etc , we sit in our homes and marvel over the crime and it’s escalation with our families and friends and we continue to attend conferences and seminars to better ourself and security companies have shot up because the human race has become more violent and hurtful to one another than ever before. In fact…. it PAYS to break the law than to protect it. When do we stop talking about it and do something about it. Why is it murder or culpable homicide if we kill to protect ourselves or others.

As a child I remember telling my mother that I wanted to be a pilot. I don’t know what happened to that dream. But I blinked and I no longer knew who I was. What happened to the little girl who wanted to become a pilot ? Did you have one of those “when I’m older I went to be……” moments at school show and tell? I don’t recall what and when was the turning point in my life where I became… different ? Or was I always different ? I never had friends at school. I mean, I was popular. Right until matric. Everyone knew me. But again since then I was just known. Didn’t have many friends, I was just notorious for being outspoken, challenging teachers, asking too many questions that private schools didn’t want curious minds to ask.

The people who control all of this, want standardized education, brainwashing,worthless information that molds the brain to be respectful, take orders, be told what to do and if you do it well, you get a gold star on your chart. When you lose a leg in the army after that fighting for your country, a fight that you did not choose, they reward you with a gold star too in the form of a medal.

You’ve lost a limb, suffer PTSD, stay away from your family for months at a time ,

Miss your child’s upbringing and you get rewarded with a medal and you feel proud. You feel like you have achieved. That is what brain washing is.

Ask no questions. Do as you’re told. Obey the rules. They teach you this since you’re 4 years old so that it molds into your character. They say you’ll be forged into a person by age 7. The toys that are made are to follow pattens, place Shaped blocks into matching shaped holes. Square blocks go into square holes. Triangle blocks go into triangle holes. These are toys for children but what they really teach other than cognitive thinking and coherency is that for every one shaped hole, there is only one fitting and matching shaped block. What does that represent ? You cannot mix and match.

But I asked questions at home or play school. If the triangle was small enough to fit through the square could I still do it ?? And I was told no. Rules.

Rules. Rules. Red tape. Whoever is educating us do not want free thinkers. They do not want smart people. I am not talking about book smart. Anyone can read a book and learn it off by heart and be a genius and ace their exams. But how SMART are they! How daring are you to question everything ? Everything everything everything. Everything you’ve ever been taught. Everything you’ve learnt. I am.

I turned out to be burnt out by 27 and 28 and spent a year and a bit recovering from health issues because ONE person challenging an entire system, organization, institutionalizations…. etc, where do you even begin? It will make you sick, it will make you hurt yourself , it will make you want to give up, it will make you feel like your beliefs aren’t really true. But that’s exactly what they want. Tire out the different one. Break them until they conform. And if they don’t, they’ll die trying to show the world that there is a whole NEW EARTH as said by Eckhardt Tolle. I urge you to read his book: a new earth. It changed my life. For better or for worse – I’m glad I know what I know. I’m glad I’ve evolved. I’m glad I know there’s more….

I believe that the system works for a number of reasons…. it keeps millions of people under control. Well behaved. Governed. Stopped from ripping eachother apart like savages. Laws were created by law makers, legislators, and the executive created Law enforcement.

This principle applies worldwide and not just in South Africa. The problem is I am not a rule obeyer. I am not a law abiding citizen. I decided after school I was going to study the law and investigate how all of this worked.

How to get around it . How could I live a life as free as I wanted… free… I mean… who decided they own this Earth and why do I pay to live here ? I wanted to investigate human rights. I wanted to investigate animals rights. I wanted to investigate what it took to preserve our earth and live with the least negative impact on this planet.

I became a lawyer. I did the Fucking lectures,

I wrote the exams , I jumped through the proverbial hoops and I did what the system required me to do in order to be called “a lawyer”. The earth belongs to all its inhabitants but now I needed a job. To pay bills to live on a planet that belonged to me on land I couldn’t understand why wasn’t mine ? Automatically. That’s right. I said it.

What I’m saying sounds crazy, insane…. but I honestly feel , “ am I the only sane one here ? Does nobody else think about these things. “ needless to say I felt I was carrying too much of a heavy burden. Finding my answers were going to be nearly impossible . I couldn’t ask for help because I’d be admitted to a mental facility.

So I broke down for the last two or three years searching for answers, traveling to India, to the Himalayas, helping the poor, helping animals worldwide, raising funds for those less fortunate, going to the Himalayas where it began. Right at the top of mihabodi temple in Bihar, India where Buddha found enlightenment… and I found so many of my answers to a simple and fulfilling life where I’d need nothing more than a plate of food and to practice yoga, but I unfortunately had to return and an ascetic life cannot be pursued in a western world the way it is pursued in the mountains of the Himalayas where spiritual power is situated all around you. I can’t explain it.

I’m sure in the Buddhist teachings and many other teachings it’s says your faith and how you choose to practice it shouldn’t depend on WHERE you are but how much faith you have to pursue it through difficult circumstances but I honestly find that Eastern and Western traditions , cultures, religion and way of life are just too different to be 100% authentic on either side. Middle ground needs to be met and compromises need to be made on both sides for there to be peaceful coexistence. I cannot practice Buddhism and the 8 limbs of yoga authentically where I am. I need support from masters of their craft. And in rishikesh where yoga originated , there are only masters of this craft. I speak of people who have practiced this activity which is the most spiritual way of connecting to oneself and the Universe or your higher power or God.

You cannot understand it until you are in it. Yoga is not a sport. It is a way of life… I’ve shared so many ideas here but I have no idea how to channel it into a book or to explore other ideas or to explain further. I need to think on each topic , of which there are so many that I’ve raised… but after a long dark hole, I’ve come to realize that I do have hopes and dreams and things I wish to achieve – which I thought I no longer had !! So… I can start again at 28! I am young and I have so much more wisdom now than I did at 18.

X Sabina

CHANGE

Change:  The key to change is acknowledging that there is actually a problem or that you are not happy or that something in your life isn’t really feeling right and there is a void or a lack of fulfilment. This tends to happen more and more these days because people are lonelier and unhappier than ever before.

As humans, we are born to survive. We were designed to search for food, build little communities, be active in our daily lives, create shelter and probably “belong” which gives a person a sense of purpose. In the last 100 years, we has humans have lost a sense of purpose. Food is gathered for us, houses are built and furnished, we go to the grocery store, we have cars to travel… no need to see your brother or sister or parents… you have a phone that can easily send a measly text message with just a few words. We have stopped all sense of real communication and connection with one another.  We wake up in the morning and go to jobs and universities that train us to fulfil an idea that will give us some sort of economic value rather than a UNIQUE identity where we are making REAL contributions to the communities and societies we live in. We deal with computers, monitors, texts, emails and applications, not with one another.

Now as a person who woke up 2 years ago and realised that I had a very deep hole in my life, practising as a lawyer, pursuing a career which I thought would bring me much success and happiness including financial freedom (eventually… have you seen what Junior attorneys are paid these days?), I sometimes wonder if it was a mistake to leave a career in pursuit of happiness, soul searching, self discovery and to contribute and make a difference in causes that I am passionate about such as animal welfare, wildlife conservation, environmental protection as well as change in change the way we consume as human beings. All of my friends have careers or even just jobs and I’m 27 and jobless and have no idea what I want to do. Or I know what I want to do but it doesn’t earn a living. Now tell me… would you encourage any person caught in a dead-end job or life to make the CHANGE if you knew that a few years later you would be living off savings and loans and stuck between a rock and a hard place?

I wouldn’t. If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have left my career and I would have 4 years post qualification experience in the legal field, be making a ton of money in a corporate environment and I would be able to rescue all the animals I wanted, financially, not physically and I would be able to meet all my bills and eat out every week and travel to new countries every year. How can you compare the two? Society has made it SO difficult for people to be true to themselves and their inner callings and what they’re passionate about and that if you do, you’ll spend your life paying the consequences. Am I the only one that feels that doing what you love is a constant struggle?

I would like to think that there are higher forces at work than just my own ego and beliefs. Some people call that God or a higher power or whatever but apparently concealing how we really feel is how we do things these days. We hide everything, sweep it under the rug and there it sits and gathers dust until the pile of shit under the rug becomes SO intolerable that you end up having a break down and need to end up doing all sorts of therapy, healing, going to psychiatrists, taking all sorts of meds and then you end up AGAIN… thinking that something needs to CHANGE. This is how the world has become. We are born into systems that make us so incredibly unhappy and trapped that we cant actually make changes and if we do, we are stuck with low earning potential, being misunderstood, feeling lost and helpless and then again, back into the system in the form of “depression and anxiety” resulting in doctors who makes money off of us with meds.

It’s not a negative post, its a reality and thought process I have been having for a while and probably thought that a lot of people out there could relate to it and might actually have the same feelings and maybe reading this might make you feel better and just know you aren’t alone in the whole circle of life! There are us few who exist in the middle of nowhere still trying to find out who we are and where we belong in this big bad world 🙂

While you try figure that out, you can always save some kittens and push this shit under the rug ❤

xoxoxo

 

 

 

 

LINCOLN: My Miracle kitten

It was November 2016 and I had just quit my job as an attorney and wanted to travel with my then boyfriend. I had to suddenly return to South Africa due to the death of my closest uncle and someone I considered a second father to me. It was so tragic and unexpected that I slumped into a deep depression. You know those people that you think will NEVER die because they’re just so vital to your own existence and the existence of those around you ? He was that person. The glue that held the entire family together. The one you could call. The one you could count on. And then he was killed in robbery.

Safe to say, my relationship fell apart but we were still living together. I had two cats I adopted from a rescue centre in Johannesburg called Kitty and Puppy Haven. They were just 1 year old – both of them. Biscuit was the boy that I chose. Ratsby was the girl and my boyfriend at the time chose her. We called her Ratsby because she was scrawny and loved to eat, a bit of a rat. But we loved her so very much.

November in South Africa is Spring/Summer – but mostly summer and thats when we get a lot of rain and thunderstorms. I was slumped over trying to overcome the death of my uncle. My father worked with his brother at a furniture factory in Pretoria. There were torrential rains that week. My mom sent me a picture of this tiny little kitten that washed up on the road just next to my uncle’s factory (my dad’s brothers factory). It seemed that perhaps his mother and siblings may have been washed away or drowned in the rains. He was just SO SO tiny. I couldn’t believe the photograph. My mother told me that my cousin was going to keep it. She always wanted a kitty. This was her chance!

Soon she realised that perhaps with work and never having had a cat before, the responsibility might be too great and a bit scary in the face of have a kitten just a few days old and had very slim chances of survival. She called me up and said “He’s all yours if you want him. Can you come and get him? He’s just so tiny that he’s in a blanket in a box in my bathroom. I have to rush to work, but come over and just grab him okay? ”

For the first time in weeks I had a hint of a smile, excitement and a reason to be just a little grateful to be alive. I got to try save a life of my own. When I saw Lincoln for the first time, his eyes were just SO SO BLUE. He was still blind or could barely see just yet. He was so small, he was learning to stand. He had probably been two weeks old. How he survived I had no idea? All alone, no milk, no warmth, no siblings. That soul was a proper fighter. He had this incredible spirit and will to live. It’s like I was meant to have him and he was meant to have me. He taught me all about will and survival and the importance of having someone not give up on you. I had kitty formula and a syringe and even a kitty bottle that my cousin bought. I read all the instructions, mixed formula and just tried and tried to feed him. He barely ate, he barely moved. He just slept and slept and slept. I read online that you have to massage the bum of a kitty with a warm cotton ball to stimulate them to wee or poo because at that age their mothers would lick them in order to help them excrete. I tried and tried for two days to make him wee and poo but only wee came out onto the cotton ball. During all this time he was living in my old bedroom at my Mother’s house. I had been living with my boyfriend but he was NEVER going to let me bring another cat into his home. I had to beg for the first two anyway and he didn’t like the responsibility of having to take care of my cats when I might not have been around.

Finally, after much begging and kitty manipulation, he let me bring Lincoln home to our place and he lived in our spare bathroom. Bear in mind that the bathtub with a blanket inside could have seemed like two football fields to him. We didn’t want to name him because I promised my boyfriend that we would give him to a friend. I just wanted to care for him to ensure his survival before we gave him away. Eventually after 3 days of milk and massaging , Lincoln made his VERY FIRST POO. it was about 15cm LONG!!! He must have been so dehydrated and constipated because he just couldnt go to the toilet. I really thought that something was happening inside and that he might die on us. But he didn’t. He made this laaaaaaaaarge poo in the little box that I put him in after a few minutes of massage and from then on, he began to cry for food, attention, cuddle and fall asleep in my hair. He truly was my miracle. Like a little baby.

He needed to be bottle fed every 3 hours and I hadn’t had a job at that point so I was able to nurture, feed and love him until we loved him so much that we were never going to give him up. Lincoln brought the excitement back into our home and into my life. He made me excited to wake up in the morning. So much had gone wrong. I had left my job on the premise that I would travel with my boyfriend, get engaged and plan this amazing wedding and just maybe, take some time off for myself.

But – the Universe had other plans.

My uncle was taken from us. My grandmother was very ill with cancer and she soon followed  my uncle and passed away. My boyfriend and I broke up, I had to move out of his home with nowhere to go with my animals…. but in all this… Lincoln…. Lincoln was my strength, my reason to wake up, my baby that I hand-reared. I felt responsible for every every feeling he will ever have because when I was broken and had nothing he inspired me. My little boy too lost everything and was all alone and surrendered to the Universe and he found his way to me. I really think he came to teach me a few lessons. I stopped partying as much. I never wanted to go out too long because I know my “child” was at home waiting for me. I cleaned up my act and became more compassionate just as a mother would.. because I couldn’t let Lincoln down?

Lincoln was just so little that we decided to name him Abraham Lincoln – the longest name in history for such little creature. He was meant for me and I for him and its 1 year and 3 months later and he has brought so much joy into my life and into the lives of my other two cats who are just 1 year older than him. He has so much PAZZAZZ, so much ATTITUDE, so much ENERGY and the largest EARS I’ve ever dealt with. I used to let people come over to my place and drink and smoke pot and do their drugs and whatever they wanted and for the last 15 months NOBODY is allowed into my personal space with any of that shit that may harm the kids in my house which are my cats.

Sometimes I think spirits/souls are sent to you for a reason and this is one of those time I know for sure that Lincoln was sent to me for my personal growth. I never wanted him to be homeless. I never wanted him to be hungry or alone. I found the most beautiful home in a secure estate with lots of trees and gardens for Lincoln to play with my other cats and before I do anything for myself, I wonder if my 3 children have everything they need. Everyday we go for walks and Biscuit, Ratsby and Lincoln follow suit like little dogs. My neighbours are amazed. Cats that follow their owner like dogs? what kind of cats are these? MY KIND 🙂  Lincoln gardens with me, he watches Netflix with me, he sits on the toilet seat while Im drawing my bath….. when I cook he sits on the kitchen counter waiting for me. When I climb into bed he climbs into the blankets on the other side. Its a good thing that I am single now – because there definitely is NO SPACE for a boyfriend now. Lincoln is the King and boss of the house and my bed is full and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Thank you Lincoln for being the light of my life and making me so conscious of the nurturing energy that I always had in me that you brought out to the surface. I could never live without you.

Please see pictures of Lincoln and his growth over the years from when I got him. Please share beautiful comments for me to read to Lincoln. He would love to know that he has fans! Lincoln is the official WATER4PAWS initiative Mascot! He is the pawpatrol officer and checks that all the water being sent down to Cape Town for the drought stricken animal shelters are just puurrrrrfect!

 

 

 

10 things I find extremely therapeutic

1. Believe it or not I find that cleaning out my closet every few months when the clothes and shoes start piling up in different spaces where they dont belong, very therapeutic. But it needs to reach breaking point first. When your gym clothing are all mixed with your more fancy clothing and different pairs of shoes are in different cupboards and you have worn the same jeans atleast 3 times and it begins to lie on “the chair” instead of being hung up again…. then things are getting messy. REALLY messy. The underwear draw is a bleeding mess, you cant find the socks that you like the most or even the bra that you wear with certain tops because everything is all so muddled! THAT is when the time is right. Strike then! JUST DO IT. Open the closets and throw everything out, sit on the floor and start folding and taking out old things from scratch.  This is one of the most therapeutic but time consuming things to do. Believe me, in the end it will be worth it.

2.      Stretching and Yoga. I love to stretch and try touch my toes. I probably sit and stretch a few times a week to get all my muscles going and joints healthy. It just feels like you’re reactivating muscles and tendons that havent been worked in a while and the dull pain of the stretch is really a good pain and I sleep much better afterward.

3. Doing the dishes. I cant leave a pile of dirty dishes in the sink. Especially when I know there wont be a domestic coming over to help me do a spring clean or thorough clean of my place. I find that cleaning up after myself, usually by washing the dishes once a few items are in the sink, it makes me feel like i’ve done some chores and I feel really good about myself.

4. Brushing my cats. Okay. So you have to like animals and you need to have the patience to sit with a pet brush and just give a good brush for like 10 or 15 minutes. Listening to them purr away and watching the brush build up with so much fluff that you could actually build another whole cat is actually very therapeutic. Not only are you grooming your fluffy friend but catching all that hair and preventing it from getting all over your furniture and house is pretty great!

5. Watering my garden. I love the idea that watering my garden will make my grass greener and make my plants grow. Everytime I see the rose bushes have a new bud coming up, I take out the hose pipe and I water the garden and all the plants and I love to see new flowers blossom. Its the feeling of feeding the Earth and particularly on scorchers like today, its so calming and relaxing when your feet get all wet and you can walk around barefoot getting cooled down. I know deep down my garden and plants are thanking me. AND my cats! they love to hide in the shade of the shrubs so they need to keep being healthy and watered at all times.

6. Cardio at the gym. I just work off my entire day. If I have had a horrible week or day, walking on the treadmill or cycling for 30 minutes or an hour is just what I need. You kind of sweat the old horrible day off of you and you release all the endorphins and your body feels great and healthy and I just have such a great, positive outlook afterward. Nothing like a great cardio session at the gym for some therapy for the mind, body and soul.

7. Deleting old messages and photos off of my phone. LET  GO OF THE PAST!! YUCK! You dont need that picture of you and the ex, no matter how hot you look in the photo. Let it go. The twenty selfies you took yesterday and only just used one for instagram… well there are 19 others piling up sucking up storage on your phone. I love clearing out old baggage!

8. Getting a pedicure. Self explanatory. Beautiful looking feet are better than just normal looking feet because feet are feet and that in itself is gross. (I dont like feet)

9. Completing the end of a season of a series. Its really therapeutic for me to get closure on things I’ve been thinking about in regard to something I have been watching on TV. In the middle of a season I am constantly wondering how things will end, what characters will die and what will the season culminate in?! How will the directors continue on!! The suspense kills me. At the end of a season I can turn the TV off and KNOW that I dont need to think about the outcome for another year or two until the next season is released. Its a great feeling of closure and finality.

10. Cutting off split ends. Nothing like great and healthy feeling and looking hair!

Diana: Princess of Wales and Hero

A lot of people dont think its very cool to have a hero these days. Like it lessens them somehow? People have become so self-involved and arrogant and image conscious that they dont even speak about their hero’s and who they admire and are inspired by. Not that this generation, the millenniuls , have any hero’s to look up to. What? The Kardashians? Supermodels in panties and a bra most of their lives? Corrupt politicians? That era of real true leadership has vanished, but, for the record:

I admire Diana (Spencer), Princess of Wales, who I believe died too soon and it was probably her honestly and humanity that killed her. After watching about 4 different documentaries on her and her life, I find that she had such an enormous power. The power of the worlds attention. Everyone sitting on the edge of their seats waiting to just get another glimpse of her. This is the time when the press were starting to use long lenses, tabloids were absolutely going ballistic and the beast we call the “Paparazzi” were born.

She placed the beating heart into the royal family, who I think are a bunch of cold, entitled assholes who honestly couldnt handle her power and honesty. Women were supposed to be a support system to their Royal Prince, not be independent and become a global presence, global brand and powerhouse on your own. I mean, you’re a woman! How dare you! Misogynistic pricks! In this day and age who really needs or respects a Monarchy? They are a mere symbolism, a tradition and culture that is admired. They don’t actually rule the land. Their Parliament and PM actually do all the heavy lifting, while the Queen and her chronies sit on their asses spending money, attending polo matches and showcasing the Crown Jewels which are all the precious stones and jewels they stole from every country they colonised. But Diana. She brought the “fairytale” to life.

She showed the entire world that through she was a princess, she was an ordinary person just like everyone else. She was a human being.  Her sense of humanity, ironically, is what killed her. I dont know why it is, but she suffered tremendously. Its quite strange. We commoners couldnt conceive that a royal princess married to, at that time, dashing prince Charles, could know anything about suffering.

I mean what was so difficult about being obscenely wealthy, driven around by bodyguards and chauffeurs, having cleaners and chefs and personal shoppers waiting on you hand and foot?

But Diana didnt want all that. She always already had all that. She was a Spencer and the Spencers were extremely wealthy farmers and played an intergral role in what England is today. Diana didn’t have ANYONE to love her. Ironic isn’t it? The most adored woman on Earth, yet the loneliest and unhappiest . She lacked a consistent source of love and support, emotionally, and she practically raised her sons, who are the heirs to the very institution that she did not want to be a part of, on her own.

When you reflect on your own life, how many of you have a consistent source of love and support? Someone or a group of people who can really feed you emotionally, stimulate you mentally and protect you ? I know I sometimes feel all alone. Actually, on a daily basis I feel alone. There are people there arent there, I mean your mom or dad, or your friends, but can you really tell them whats eating you inside, your deepest secrets, your eating disorders, your loneliness, your every thought and whim? Because Diana couldnt? She had nobody.

Sobering thought.

She was just 19 years old when it all began. Many of us, born-free’s, millenniuls and this new generation will never know just what an icon, magnificent, complex and beautiful rebel she really was. She rebelled against a thousand year (approximately, give or take 500 years 😉 ) monarchy and their traditions. She broke free, like a beautiful dove from the confines of a cage and she flourished. She is a true hero and a female figurehead for women to look up to.

She was aristocratic yet common, she was simple yet complex, she was beautiful and natural and she was kind and all she wanted was to be loved and to be free. She held babies with AIDS, when others wore gloves, she visited hospices, she walked through minefields in Angola, she inspired and walked with the poor. She was a real humanitarian in the very core of her being,

Wanting to be loved and free is not an unreasonable request from any woman. It is a given. It is a basic human need. And she never got it.

Diana is definitely one of my hero’s. Died just too soon.

Operation Troysen : a sting operation to save the life of a remarkable pitb

I had woken up during the festive period, probably the day after Christmas and was scrolling down on my Facebook page just endlessly staring at all the photos of my friends traveling all across the world, while I sat at home bitterly because my long time boyfriend and I had broken up and he had gone to Israel without me. On a trip we booked together.

I was looking for some sort of inspiring story that would really push me to do something to my fullest potential and then some. I found an excerpt type of post from Friends of the Calitzdorp Animals – FOCA (they are an animal welfare organisation in that specific area. It had said that Troysen, a 3 year old pitbull was constantly being brought in with horrific injuries such as lacerations to his skin, exposing meat and bone, that he had been stabbed in the left eye with a broken glass bottle and that they had to remove the glass piece – resulting in Troysen becoming totally blind in the left eye. He was starved, aggressive, scared and confused. It was very clear to the woman handling him at FOCA that this dog was being used as a BAIT dog in a dog fighting syndicate.

The woman at FOCA took the dog away and had placed him in the local pound and had posted a very sad post on Facebook of a dog that was just 3 years old and who had suffered all this incredible hardship and that usually how things worked in animal rescue, is that the dog will be euthanized (put to sleep) if he could not be homed within a week! I found this post and went mental (that’s the short story).

So, the day after Christmas, I am on the phone with FOCA looking for the right woman to speak to, who was Karen Whitley, then I forced and put immense pressure to get him out of that pound before they euthanized him. Please bear in mind that I live in Johannesburg, South Africa and this was all unfolding in Oudtshoorn! That is a probable 10 hour drive from where I live. Needless to say, dozens of calls were made back and forth and emails exchanged. Karen needed permission from the pound manager for Troysen to be released to us. The pound manager, who I will name here, Colleen, informed that Troysen was a pitbull who was used in dog fighting syndicates, he was not up for adoption, he was not up for rehabilitation and in short that he was not worth all that trouble and they will continue to euthanise him.

Colleen went on holiday and Karen and I arranged with another worker to have him released to us. This is the sting operation. We needed to sneak Troysen out of the pound, unseen (although he is a 30kg fully grown pitbull!!!) and get him to the VET in order to be neutered (sterilized so no further puppies can be made) and to be vaccinated. I bore all these costs. I then needed Karen to put Troysen on a plane and send him to me in Johannesburg. All these arrangements and events were taking place between Christmas and New years eve when literally the entire world is a ghost town and you cant get service nor help, not even if you had $1 000 000.00. Not in South Africa and not in this industry (animal welfare/rescue).

It dawned on Karen to call me up and say “just how fucking mad in your mind are you? To do something crazy?”

and not sure what was coming next….. I replied “pretty fucking insane I would say. What do you suggest?”

“You leave your house on New Years Day, 1 January 2018 at about 7am and drive to meet me in a little town in the middle of South Africa called Colesberg. Its about a 7 to 8 hour drive from you. And I will leave my place with Troysen at the back, with a blanket and some food and water, from Oudsthoorn and meet you in Colesberg around 2pm. My drive will be about 6 hours because we need to stop to let the dog eat, drink and do his business out on the plants.”

I felt this silence… thinking… this was insane? Would i drive 15 hours to safe a dog? Do I love animals that much? I mean I can donate, whats the difference, why cant I just donate? Do people do crazy stuff like this? What would my friends and family say when I cancelled all my new years eve plans in order to drive about 700km away to collect a dog. A potentially dangerous dog in a dangerous South Africa……

“OKAY! LETS DO IT” is what I heard come out of my mouth to Karen. “We will sort out the logistics tonight or tomorrow, get some rest, its going to be a crazy mission, but lets do it.”

New years day arrived and I literally didnt think I was going to do it, but I woke up, had my bag packed, dog bed ready, blankets, food bowls, snacks for the car, two massive bags of high quality biltong (similar to beef jerkey. Its dried out meat) and some music to keep me sane on this incredibly long journey. I drove. I called Karen, She was driving. We were driving… to exchange a 30kg Pitbull that would have been killed that very next day. We drove and drove. 7 hours later in excellent time, we arrived at the same stop at the same time. Troysen was handed over to me and I could not believe what all the fuss was about. He was in terrible condition lookswise because he had so many scars and bites and was blind in an eye. You could see that this was an abused dog. But he was not violent, aggressive or angry? He wagged his tail so much I thought it might FALL OFF.

We made our way back (Troysen and I). We allowed him a long walk around the stop we were at, we allowed him to wee and poo and eat a ton of food and off he went back into my car. I was driving two hours back to a town called Bloemfontein. Its the same town that houses our Supreme Court of Appeal, what used to be the highest court in the land, so its a pretty significant town and well developed. We now have the highest most senior court in Johannesburg, being the Constitutional Court.

I didnt think Troysen could stand being in a car for about 14 hours straight so I booked into Acacia Lodge, an excellent, pet friendly bed and breakfast. The rooms was immaculate and HUGE. They allowed Troysen to stay in the room with me, because its a PET FRIENDLY hotel! Troysen was so shocked that he could sleep indoors, that he had TWO BOWLS???? One for water and one for food? He had so many treats,  he walked around like perhaps he had died and gone to heaven. Outside was most beautiful massive gardens with the softest greenest grass ever. He rolled around and smelt everything and was just in awe. There was more to life than being starved and beaten and hurt and nearly killed every single day?

I took him for an hour long walk around Bloemfontein on a very tight lead, bribing him with meat everytime another dog would bark and try aggravate him…. teaching him that by just walking past them, he was being a GOOD BOY!!!! he caught on very quickly.

We slept the night like we were both dead, we were so exhausted. Troy had been yanked out of the pound that morning, not sure where and what was happening, expecting to be killed or thrown onto the street , endured a 6 hour long car drive and ontop of that, ANOTHER 2 hours to Bloemfontein.. He was just exhausted. So was I.

He was so well behaved, he slept in his dog bed with a teddy bear most of the night, until those eyes manipulated me into allowing him into MY BED which he then slept on and snored all night. It was a happy time for me. We had saved this boy’s life. He was perfect, he was friendly, he was big and protective, he was well mannered, he doesnt mess the house, he waits patiently for his food. I couldnt fathom why they wanted to euthanise this dog? Because he was a pitbull? This stigma needs to go!

People do this to them. They starve these dogs, beat them relentlessly, throw meat just beyond their reach because theyre chained up, UNTIL their survival instincts kick in and they will kill any other dog just for a piece of FOOD. Its disgusting. Please take a stand against dog fighting.

To end off, Troysen is currently at an A-Class kennel, the best in Johannesburg. He is on antibiotics and some treatments and he is being rehabilitated and this beautiful baby will go home to his forever home soon!!!

Special thanks to Karen Whitley and her partner, Stella and Nick Meldau and all the lovely people that donated to this trip and the costs of the trip. You people are incredible. Pics and Videos to follow

INDIA : a bucket list trip (Part 2)

 

 

So… where were we?  Oh yes! So I watched Youtube and Instagram posts that brought tears to my eyes. I emailed Animal Aid and got in touch with the founder, Erika Abrahams. I asked her whether people were allowed to visit her shelter or volunteer there. I was amazed and so excited to get a response from her informing me that loads of people travel from all over the world to visit their rescue center in Udaipur, Rajasthan and that I didnt even need to inform them that I was coming, I could just book my plane tickets and accomodation arrive and report for Volunteer duty!

I went online immediately. At this point in my life I had decided to take a year or so off from practising law in order to travel and pursue other passions. I was also in a very serious relationship which I honestly thought would have resulted in an engagement and I wanted to take some time off to enjoy that part of my life. In an unfortunate series of events, a family member – the next closest person I had to my father, passed away, my relationship ended and I was out of a job. The perfect time to go on a quest or journey to do something I was so passionate about – saving animals.

I booked my trip to India. It would take ages to get there and 3 different international flights.. When I had arrived, it was honestly a culture shock. You think you’re Indian, until you arrive in India! There were cows all over the roads, homes, highways and everywhere you looked – cows. Thousands of dogs too, all strays. It was heart wrenching to see so many neglected and hungry, unloved, unappreciated dogs. Where I stay dogs = Gods. My friends who are dog owners worship their dogs. They live on fluffy beds, eat all day, get walked, taken to the park, treated and loved to death. India was very very different. I knew instantly that I had made the right decision in going. Animal aid had so many different sections and areas. Ones for dogs suffering with mange (a skin disease), ones for dogs that had to have amputations or that were probably run over by cars and were paralysed – that was the “handicapped haven”., there were sections for blind dogs and sections for emergency new comers that needed serious operations or treatment for tumours and so forth. This was really a shock to my system and I had to toughen up and hold back tears on nearly every animal I saw.

The workers at Animal Aid India were the strongest and most resilient people I had ever met. They worked relentlessly in 36 degree heat with unreal humidity. They never complained EVER, they took their 15 minute tea breaks and 1 hour lunch breaks and were back to work immediately! They were so invested into animal welfare. I had never seen so many people working so hard doing manual labour, with smiling faces and an appreciation to actually just have a job! Everyday my body was so sore. Every muscle ached. We fed hundreds of dogs, we needed to walk and carry heavy blind dogs, we needed to herd cattle, we needed to change and wash blankets, we needed to pick up and clean up dog sh@! and we needed to wash 100’s upon 100’s of dishes every day. The experience was humbling and really changed my life. Some of the workers could work 14 to 16 hour days and leave to go home without one single complaint and were still laughing and joking at the end of their day where they rarely even sat down. That is what you call work ethic at its best.

In India it is against the law to euthanise cows as they are considered sacred. They provide milk and are mothers and are regarded as holy animals. One of the most terrible things we endured daily was receiving in cow’s that had  been hit by cars on a busy highway and had broken backs and crack and broken spines and were unable to walk and would probably die quite soon. We had strict instructions to render pain medication and anesthetics and we had to wait until they died naturally. Sometimes that would take days and to come in every single day and watch an animal die…. slowly… was crushing. The trip changed my life and my outlook on what food we consume, the way we consume it, why we consume it. I had learnt so much from  Sothe very individuals that that I, 10 years prior, had thought so little of. I was ashamed. I was not worthy of them. The men and women were so strong mentally, emotionally and physically and almost all the workers and, well, most people in India, were vegetarian!

When I returned to South Africa I had not eaten meat on my entire trip so I decided to stay vegetarian as well. It was not an easy decision and on occasion the need for protein just maims me but I

mostly follow a vegetarian diet without dairy either. I had had too much respect for all the cattle I cared for in India. Each and every one of them, cows, goats, sheep, I realised, were sentient beings. They too felt pain. They too were afraid of rain and people. They too were heart broken to be separated from their young or their herds. I could not ignore what I had experienced.  I had learned compassion for all living beings and the reward I felt after helping a person or an animal was so much more than the satisfaction of a momentary tasty bite.

I will upload some photographs from the trip. Here are some links to some videos of some of the work done by Animal Aid. Their work and what they do for animals is nothing short of miraculous.

 

INDIA : A bucket list trip that changed my life

In South Africa, I am considered Indian racially. When I complete forms, applications for facilities, medical aid, bank documents, vehicle finance, studies (you get the point), I tick the Indian box under “race”. I, however, never really considered myself as Indian culturally. I always had trouble fitting in to a quite a strict and traditional culture. I was modern, progressive and didnt want be placed in a “box” per se.

I never liked watching Bollywood films, I thought they were too long, they had too many musicals and they were all about love and seemingly unrealistic. I never had Indian friends either growing up! So, all in all, I thought of myself as the furthest thing from being Indian culturally and racially so when India came to be one of the best and most enlightening trips of my life : even I was surprised and in awe.

I previously visited India when I was about 13 for a family friend’s wedding in Jaipur. It was at the renowned Rambagh Palace. Needless to say, at the tender age of 13, I was a bratty, arrogant and self-entitled little child and didnt enjoy the trip at all. I thought of India as undeveloped and dirty and poverty stricken and from then on I vowed to never go back under any circumstances. I was set out to travel to places such as London, New York, Amsterdam, Singapore, etc. The modern world where the malls were massive, the hotels were made from marble and precious stones, they were the fashion capitals of world and there was no poverty, but endless shopping and sight seeing.

As I grew up, things changed. I changed. The fancy things, the material world fell away and the calling to help the poor, part-take in philanthropic work and fight for animal rights and rescuing animals became my passion. Technology became more advanced and we started using our phones for everything. I browsed the internet for ages reading up on work in the UN or international animal rescue agencies and then I turned to Instagram and Youtube to find images or videos that intrigued me and that I fancied watching.  I watched countless of videos of men and women lowering themselves into wells, dams and other deep, dark and dangerous places, in order to save stranded animals! Risking their lives…. The videos were deeply moving and always brought tears to my eyes. They helped all animals! Dogs, cats, cows, chickens, camels, tortoises and so many more!

Who were these people? What t-shirt’s were they wearing? What organisation was this? Where were they based and most importantly, HOW DO I JOIN?

and that… was how I learnt about Animal Aid India. I HAD TO GO THERE.  (part 2, coming soon)

Mornings

Every morning I wake up (obviously) and open my eyes and think of a dozen reasons as to why I should stay in bed longer. I turn my face around and squash it, face down, into my pillow. The residual smell of the shampoo from the day before is just so aromatic and full of pheromones that I just feel like nesting there. Even on the hottest of days, I put the fan on its highest setting and then snuggle into my blankets, waiting for my cats to join me….. but then it dawns on me : the chores, the errands, the calls to be made and the work to be done.

I have to get out of bed, I say to myself. While this whole process draws out in the span of an hour, the up and down of justification and procrastination and reasoning and all the rest, I still must say that there is something about a NEW Day they excited me. New goals, new chores, New possibilities and new adventures! The mornings are make believe promises at another chance at life. You can start losing this extra 2 or 3kg of belly fat, you can work toward that new bedroom suite and curtains, you can save for your ideal home, you can meet your dream man! The possibilities in the morning are endless…

My morning routine consists of drinking a huge glass of cold water the very first thing, running around cleaning cat dishes from the night before and restocking their cat pellets in half empty bowls (cats want their bowls full) otherwise they think you’ve betrayed them and are starving them to death and think of your lack of filling their pellets to overflowing point, is an act of neglect and cruelty: why I have so many of there furry master manipulators, I have no clue! I then brush my teeth and wash my face with an array of assorted pastes and washes and exfoliators they have different purposes ( I am almost certain all the ladies get that ? One tooth paste normal, one for whitening, one charcoal, one face wash, one exfoliator, one mask, one illuminating serum, one eye sculpting gel, one face pro youth serum and finally your day cream ). Consumerism at its best.

I plonk back onto my bed and dig out gym clothes because I run all my errands in them and then hopefully actually make it to the gym afterward. Sometimes just wearing them and not even going makes me feel better about my body and weight, as though wearing them will make me lose the weight. Wishful thinking. Off I go!

What is your morning routine like ?